Dunglish

I found this one at Schiphol airport. The Dutch said “kijk voor meer informatie over uw reis op XYZ”, or in more polite terms “for more information about your journey visit XYZ”. The use of the imperative here sounds rude even though it was meant to be polite. Truth is, it’s open season on the “Netherlands Railways” (that’s what they call themselves in English), as their service is unreliable.

Here’s a Dunglish combo, which I assume was meant to sound familiar. “Haring” is “herring” in Dutch, but the words are compounded à la hollandaise. Grabbing a quick herring sandwich with pickles and onions is tasty, but not really common practice outside the Netherlands. That was what Branko thought when he spotted this stand.

“Dump” is simply Dutch for “surplus shop”, army and navy, making this sign Dunglish and ha-ha funny. On the road between Amsterdam and Rotterdam, there’s a sign with “baby dump”, which always brightens up the drive down south. But that’s Dutch.

Working for a living? How bloody boring. Syntax problems? We’ll clean them up too if you give us a tip.

First, I commend Bram Poot for Dunglish spotting on the road. This was spotted on the A1, where many expats drive to and from Amsterdam. But that cannot be the reason. He didn’t get the hour part, and neither do I. And there were more. To quote Bram, “what’s wrong with ‘uur’ (hour in Dutch)”?

Here’s another easy hit from Amsterdam’s flower market. There are signs everywhere that say “no foto’s” (Dunglish for “no photos”), so I took this one really quickly, while waiting for the tram. You can also pay much less for these books elsewhere.

I’m back and ready to Dunglish! Before I do, I want to share a piece of “Anglitalian” with you. After having toured Italy by car and spent hours reading signs, this is the funniest I saw in the touristy town of Sorrento. English was often badly written, but never used to sound cool, only to communicate, with the exception of some odd train station graffiti.

(By the way, you can now comment on the previous post, which I had closed.)

Until June 19th I’ll be driving through France and Italy.

Dunglish was recently mentioned on the blog of aquarius.net, the world’s biggest translation site, which happens to be a Dutch company.

Dutch politicians are a major source of spoken Dunglish. Their biggests blunders involve the use of expressions, which are the most difficult thing to master in any language.

- Apparently, Dutch prime minister Gerbrandy introduced himself to Churchill with “Goodbye, Mister Churchill!” Later, Churchill said this had been the shortest conversation he had ever had.

-Prime minister Joop den Uyl once called the Netherlands “a country of undertakers”, “undertaker”, a literal translation of “ondernemer” (entrepreneur).

-EU Commissioner for Competition Neelie Kroes came up with the following last year, which was quite embarrassing:

Kroes: “Don’t throw the baby in the water”
Dutch: “Niet het kind met het badwater weggooien”
English: “Don’t throw the baby out with the bath water”

Worse, she used an expression with no direct equivalent in English:

Kroes: “Who says A, must say the rest of the alphabet”
Dutch: “Wie A zegt, moet B zeggen”
English: Something like “you have to continue what you’ve started”

Former Dutch prime minister Dries van Agt apparently said:

Van Agt: “I can stand my little man”
Dutch: “Ik kan mijn mannetje staan”
English: “I can hold my own”

There are more of these stories out there, so let’s please collect them!